I think everyone at some point in life reaches a moment in time when they have a very difficult decision to make. There seems to be no right outcome. Catch-22 if you will..damned if you do damned if you don't. Today my routine was broken (once again I am starting to get used to it) by more decisions. I can almost see why people go crazy here. The stress alone is enough to push anyone over the edge. If I wasn't a person of high mental constitution I'm sure I would be the next one to have his sanity slip right through his fingers (to be honest sometimes I wonder). Tough decisions bring nothing but stress and I have so much stress right now I have to take a rain-check on stress because I am way overbooked. I hate to do it but sometimes I just have to say "look I can't stress with you right now I'm over-stressed I'm just going to have to stress you later." I do my best to do what is right. I don't want to disappoint the people that I care about but at the same time I don't want to disappoint myself.
I am beginning to realize that Downtown LA (for some reason or another) is going to be blocked off due to some kind of drama. Today someone was shot. I investigated a bit, and it turns out that someone made an attempt to rob someone and that person was an undercover cop. I know it sounds like a script from some cheesy movie but the reality of is that for this guy the show is over. He made a bad decision. I'm sure it wasn't his first but it was definitely his last. It made me think how many more bad decisions I have left before the same thing happens to me. I don't know, all I can do is the best I can and hope that in the end the good outweighs the bad. Right now I think I am breaking even. No matter how hard I try to do the right thing somehow, somewhere, someone gets affected in a bad way. Mainly because I'm not there. I really wish I could slice myself into about 3 pieces and put each one exactly where it needed to be at exactly the right time but I guess that would be too easy. To be cliche..you can please some people some of the time..you know the rest. Bottom line is you are are always going to have to make the tough decision no matter what. I don't think when that guy woke up this morning he told himself. "today I am going to try and rob a cop" but he did and now he his dead. Deep down inside you know what you have to do. When you are at a crossroads, it's usually the difference between one that is easy and one that is hard. When in doubt I say just take the tough route. True it may not be exactly the way you want to travel because the long road is never easy..but you really have to be careful with those shortcuts because the most important thing is to never get lost.