Saturday, April 28, 2012
There is a strange duality that exists within me, almost like two sides of a coin. Perhaps, just enough edge to survive the streets, but still some compassion left in my soul to mingle with the townies. Unfortunately, my time amongst the townies is more like window shopping. A world that I can dream of, but will never have. Eventually, the streets will always be there to reclaim me. There are many that baptize by water and that sounds very precious. My baptism is by fire. In order to do this properly I have to turn my heart completely cold. No more fluffy thoughts. The sentiment only gets in the way. Even though I've been spending quite a bit of time with some very lovely people..I think that maybe it was perhaps a little too much time. That precious time has brought me great joy, yet that will do very little to soften the blow of the harsh realities that I must face. Therefore for now, those fluffy thoughts will have to be filed away until hopefully another day. I need to stay focused. Even the slightest mistakes can prove very costly and right now I just can’t afford it. It’s time to enter survival mode. It’s time to enter a place where souls are devoured by the masses and hope is in very short supply. It’s time to enter the Belly of the Beast.